Tarot Agony Aunt - Volume 3

“A lie is sometimes an easier pill to swallow.” - December 2021

Dear Tarot Oracle,

My mum is as stubborn as a mule and no matter how many news articles I print or salient points I make she simply won’t get vaccinated! I wouldn’t say she’s an anti-vaxxer more vaccine hesitant. Which is to say, I maintain hope that she could be turned if only I had the right set of keys. But so far nothing has worked! Do you have any advice?

Worried and frustrated.

Dear Worried,

I can see you clearly love your Mum and also yes you are very frustrated. You don’t go into her reasons for being vaccine hesitant in your letter but there are a host of possibilities including information not being disseminated in a clear and timely manner, or not taking into consideration language or cultural barriers in public health policy. Some communities historically have a very good reason to be leery of authority figures in white coats, and the medical community need to be accountable to that. For some a narrative involving the mendacity of figures far more powerful than them is more comprehendible than the science. A lie is sometimes an easier pill to swallow than a crisis which reveals overwhelming global failures. 

FULL DISCLOSURE: I am double vaxxed. I have had the privilege of growing up in a household where a parent was a nurse. I have worked in hospitals and am fully familiar with the problematic dynamics which occur in those spaces: something which I squarely lay at the feet of human and systemic issues. I still trust the medicine. I know it’s fallible and constantly evolving but I still trust the process. Tarot is a great tool, but it can’t map out how to influence someone’s free will. Perhaps however, we can use it to get some clarity on your situation and a path forward. 

CARD 1: SITUATION: - Eight of Swords. 

Oof. Yep we are talking about vaccinations and what do we get? Swords! The eight of swords depicts a woman in a tight situation. Blindfolded and bound, the precarity of the situation is obvious to a casual observer. One false move and she will be sliced by the blades which surround her. Or is that true? This card holds many secrets. Secret one is that the ties which bind her are loose. Secret two is the blindfold is not as tight as it seems either. She has more options than she can currently see. Her path to safety is an open and clear one (just walk forward woman!) but she remains bound by a veil of fear and doubt of her own making. This is a card which speaks of holding back, refusing to move forward into the future, usually because of a fear of getting hurt. 

This is a difficult situation for your mother. Confusion and fear are driving the choices. There is also a blindness or difficulty comprehending the information available to her, which to be honest is fair enough. A new threat needs time to be understood.

Denial is another theme of this card. When the mind encounters a threatening concept so alarming and repugnant your clever brain sometimes completely rejects the idea to protect you. Sometimes this is helpful. In this card it is keeping circumstances in stasis. No one is coming to help the woman. She needs to develop the courage to push past her psychological state to improve her physical one.

CARD 2: DEEPER INSIGHT - Seven of Swords. 

Liar Liar Pants on Fire! this card is sneaky. Look at him. Absconding with more swords than he can comfortably carry while no one is looking. In broad daylight no less! You can bet he will confidently stride back into that tent village like nothing has happened once he has hidden his stash.

This is a card about deception, trickery and lies. It’s not cruel like the five, but it runs the gamut between being a bit cheeky to telling outright lies with confidence. Where is your mother getting her information? I feel like this has shown up in this position because there is at least one specific information source which is not helping. Is there a trusted but completely misinformed friend? Is she reading or watching something a bit dodgy?

CARD 3: THE PATH FORWARD - Temperance.

Ah, balance. Not the Fox News idea of balance, but the understanding that things have fundamentally changed and it is necessary to integrate new insights into the fold. Your mother is grappling with a pretty severe internal tug of war as indicated by the cards above. Where she is at the moment is frightening, tumultuous and laced with unreliable information. She’s not being stubborn to drive you crazy, she is doing it as a way to have some control. You can’t argue with her on this one or else you will become indistinguishable from the swords invading her space and threatening her in the first card. The best path forward for you is the path of Temperance.

See the angel. They are calmly pouring the waters of life back and forth across the two cups. One foot is on the solid dependable earth, the other is immersed in the river. Some stories of this card say the Angel began with a cup of hot water and a cup of cold and they are in the process of blending the two extremes into something brand new. This process is part of what the road leading beyond the mountains suggests. See that sun rising over the horizon? Look closer, it’s not the sun. It’s a radiant crown. The path to the mountains is the path to enlightenment, and the quiet patience of the angel is an important stop along the way.

How does this tie back to your mother? You need to be her oasis of calm patience. Where Temperance lies in the major arcana sequence is after the Death card: a transformation which is irreversible. The initial panic, the lockdowns, the deaths of potentially 15 million people, the turnover in economic fortunes are all events which have occurred in rapid and shocking succession. We are not going back to normal. This is not a temporary situation. Everyone is going to understand and integrate this information in their own way and at their own pace. Your mother’s hesitancy is part of her struggle to understand and accept what has/is happening. You need to be her support in this process. Talk about what is happening and listen to her fears without judgement. Lean into curiosity and care. the object of the game is not persuasion, but healing. Progress comes from taking both your fear and love and with patience combining them into a brand new elixir of wisdom. I can’t promise this will result in your mother making the choice to get vaccinated. But this is a way to take a step back, look at the broader picture and do your best by her for now. It’s worth a shot.

XOTO